Flounder

 Today I feel absolutely directionless. 

I can't seem to shake the feeling that I don't have anywhere to go. I don't have a home. I don't have a career path that's clear. I don't have a direction. 

I know I have talent and I know I have skills but I don't know how to use them or how I want to. I don't have any money and I don't have much mental energy. It's. a struggle just getting out of bed some days and a slog. 

I don't want to keep doing the work that I'm doing but I don't know another path forward, I feel desperate and lost and without course. 

I don't want to go home. 

I don't want to work, 

I don't want to wear a suit or stockings. 

I wish I could just sleep for a long time and wake up new.  Like a moth.